SPLICED - Comments, page 3

@Constrictor
Thanks! I wanted to get some more representation in there and also show just how stubborn, bigoted, and self entitled Zeus is.
I've been very excited to introduce Veronica for a long time now.

@Chelsea_Delos
Thanks! I wanted to spend some time to show that the traumatic events that happen to the godlings actually do have an impact. No matter how emotionless they try to present themselves, all of them are hurting.
And I agree! I love Ava and Lea as a dynamic duo. Especially because Ava has existed since the origin of Lea. (seven years now).

@The Knight of the Gods
Awwwww yay!!! That's awesome! I love when people represent!! Woooohooo!!! Nice going!

@Constrictor
Yes, Veronica is transgender.

Wait, so Veronica is a trans?

Woah this is sooooooo good! Can't believe I've never read it before!

Woah that was deep. But I really liked it! Ava and Lea make a good pair! They would be a totally kickass team!

@Chelsea_Delos
Same and I don't think anyone wants to be compared to Vernon Dursley.

Quandaries are a state of indecision over what to do in an intense situation.
Veronica's band plays indie rock/pop punk songs.
Nope, that was just a joke.

Vernon reminds me of Harry Potter.

I have one question, what's Quandaries mean?
Nope I have two, what's Ava's bamd play?
Hold on..one more, I think...Can they actually strap someone to the wing?

@Constrictor
Thanks sweetie! I really appreciate the feedback! I need more comments like that to give me direction!

@The Knight of the Gods
Awesome! I just wanted to pitch in with the constructive criticism and all :-) But I'm really excited for more from the story! It's going great!

@Constrictor
I'll work on adding more about the characters themselves. I find it difficult to avoid making characters who are one dimensional and farcical, so I like to keep them simple and explore their personalities through their reactions in intense situations. But I'll keep your advice in mind.
Yes, I've always been too lazy to proofread my work before uploading it, and if I'm being completely honest I don't think that'll ever change.
As more of the gods are introduced you'll begin to see the differences. gods like Artemis, Apollo and Hera are difficult to find a different interpretation of due to the consensus of the greek's vision of them. Ares, Poseidon and Dionysus however are much easier to make unique, and I think you'll see more of that soon.

I mean it when I say it's a truley amazing story. However I'm gonna get nit-picky here. I feel like the characters personalities could be could be portrayed with a bit more detail, other then reacting to different situations for the sake of the plot. Also, an extra fee read through so could be needed, but I'm serious when I say this is the best story on this website. The characters are so relatable and I couldn't help but laugh out loud at the deadly "telephones". I really like the twist you put on it, such as the hybrids and Demi-Titans, but I feel like you could add a bit more to the god's personalities that wouldn't remind me so much of Rick Riordian's. I feel like they each could have their own special attributes. However I'm being extremely nit-picky, because I cannot express my love for this story through a comment section. Keep up the great work!!

@Chelsea_Delos
I've always thought that hypnokinesis was underrated. The ability to put people to sleep is extremely useful. Especially if you can get them into REM and lock it there, sleep paralysis would make them be unable to move.

I love it when she uses sleeping powers, because they're like nothing but they make stuff so much easier

@Chelsea_Delos
Wow, that was crazy helpful!
Like, most other quests it involves traveling, finding the foe and then defeating it. Following the hero motif and facing trails a long the way.
The monsters, referred to as 'hybrids' because chimera is already the name of a greek creature, are the reason the book is called 'Spliced', but I won't disclose much more than that.
To me, Lea isn't supposed to be a radiant figure of power and grace. She's supposed to be relatable, and human. For while Lea's character was a mary sue, but when I let go of the things that made her feel unique and important, it actually had the opposite effect. It was very liberating.
Veronica's character is not extremely substantial within the plot, but what she symbolizes and the people she represents are very important to the Godling Trilogy.
And finally, on the subject of Leash, I feel the need to remind you that Lea is pansexual aromantic. Although, clearly there is something going on between the two of them it's undetermined whether ro not that will develop further.

Well so far I think you're doing a great job introducing the characters into the new plot line. I'm not quite sure what the quest is going to be about but I like the mystery part of it, I can figure that it's got something to do with the new monsters (which I'm going to call Chimera's because they are made of different animals, so I'm guessimg different monsters aee similar) but I'm not sure what is causing them. I love how you haven't made Lea into an amazing character who can freely fight off any danger after she saved the world onece, makes it more realistic and fun. I have a feeling that Veronica is going to play a big part in the plot and I'm hoping *fingers crossed* for some Leash!

@Chelsea_Delos
Yeah, I finally had time off work this week. and I spent it all writing!
I'd love ot hear your feedback!

Yay! I logged on and there were two updates! I can't wait to read more!

@The Knight of the Gods
It's only been two months...only. But I can't wait for the camping!