The Return of Fire - Comments

Sorry Son of Hermes I didn't reply quicker, I'm not on this site very much, but Thank You SO SO MUCH for giving me some positive feed back, and I would LOVE for you to be my beta reader because I need one badly

From the one chapter I read this is a great story! It was a good length, great dialogue, and you portrayed the characters marvelously. I would love to be your "beta reader" and help improve your fanfiction.
~Son of Hermes

Nice! Like it so far, but you should probably get a beta-reader to help you fix up the formatting. Also, you clumped some of the dialogue together into large paragraphs when they should be separated by a new paragraph.

Other than that, your writing is really good. You've got lots of potential. Everyone's within the boundaries of their character, and you've done a fantastic job. Keep it up! Definitely subscribing!

-Araneae Siqua.