I was doomed to lose him over and over again. Each time I do, I remember. I remember all of them.

The Trojan War
"I hate Paris!" Jason exclaimed as he stormed into our shared bedroom.

We lived in the palace for he was one of Hector's loyal followers. Nobody besides us and his half-brother, Sarpedon, knew that he was a son of Zeus.

I sighed and walked over to my soon-to-be-husband.

"What did he do this time?" I asked as I helped Jason remove his armor.

"He took Menelaus' wife, Helen, with him." He scowled. "It won't be long before the Achaeans notice. They'll come charging towards our walls, crying for blood! Innocents will be slaughtered simply because that foolish son of Priam couldn't-"

I silenced him with a kiss. I cupped his face and tried to smoothen out the frown lines on his forehead.

He put his hands over mine before breaking the kiss and leaning forward so our foreheads touched.

"I understand your anger, my love but there is nothing you can do about it," I said. I looked into his electric blue eyes. "Paris will have to live with the consequences of his actions. We just have to pray to the gods and hope that he chooses what's right."

He nodded. "Alright." He gave me a short kiss before turning and heading to the baths.

"Join me?" He asked, his eyes glinting.

I gave him a small smile, saying nothing before following him.

~SPQR~

I bolted upright. Sweat covered my naked form even though it was cold.

Jason still had an arm thrown around my waist. He stirred and sat up.

"Rhea, what's wrong?" He asked, concern swimming through his eyes.

"M-My mother, Enyo. She sent me a vision," I said. "The Achaeans, they're on their way here. There was so much death it-"

I broke down sobbing into Jason's bare chest. He wrapped his arms around me and rubbed comforting circles on my back.

"I won't let anything harm you, Rhea," he said.

"It's not me I'm worried about," I replied. "In the vision, soldiers were lying sprawled on a ground covered with blood. Fire was burning bright in the background. Jason, what if you'll end up as one of those soldiers?!"

Jason said nothing but simply pulled me closer.

"We have to warn everyone else," I said.

"Yes, yes we do. But everyone is asleep at this moment. It can wait," he replied.

Jason kissed the top of my head. "Sleep. You need to rest. Queen Hecuba will need you by her side in the days to come."

~SPQR~

Years have passed since that night. Jason and I were already wed. After a battle with the Achaeans went sour, another War Council convened. I was by Queen Hecuba's side when it did.

"Lord Paris with all due respect, Helen is Menelaus' wife. He has every right to take her back!" Jason said.

"Brother, Jason is right. What you did was wrong. I have always taken your side when we were young boys but this?" Hector added, looking sternly at his little brother. "You should have ended your affair before we sailed for Troy. You have endangered the lives of our people!"

"But Hector, I love her!" Paris spoke up.

Jason scowled and glared at the younger son of Priam.

"The gods may hate me, you may scorn me, but I will continue to love her until I draw my final breath!" Paris gestured in my direction. "Jason, will you not do anything for Rhea?"

"Do not compare your illicit love affair with my marriage to Rhea!" Jason roared. Thunder clapped outside.

Everybody backed away, stunned. It was rare for Jason to get this angry. He was a kind and gentle man.

"Rhea is my wife the same way Helen is that of another man. The sooner you accept that, the sooner this war can end." Then Jason turned on his heel and marched out of the hall.

"Jason, wait!" Sarpedon called out, chasing his brother.

I looked at Hecuba, silently asking her if I could follow Jason. She nodded and I left her side.

I found Jason standing in front of a Temple for Zeus. He was engaged in a heated argument with Sarpedon who looked like he was trying to calm his brother down.

Sarpedon noticed me. He bowed his head and said something to Jason before leaving.

I approached my husband. His back was turned towards me. I wrapped my arms around his waist.

He tensed up for a moment before relaxing.

"I'm sorry you had to see me like that," he said.

I rested my head on his back. "There's no need to be sorry."

He removed my arms from around his waist as he turned to face me.

"Let's go back to our room," he said. I couldn't help but smile as he pulled me away from the Temple.

~SPQR~

"Where is he?" I asked one of Hecuba's other attendants.

Gwen, I think her name was, looked surprised but nevertheless, she understood who I was referring to.

"He's in Zeus' temple," she replied.

I thanked her before walking as quickly as I could to where my husband was.

I heard about what had happened. Sarpedon was killed in battle by the Achaean soldier, Patroklos who was in turn, killed by Hector.

Jason was unharmed, as far as I heard, but I was sure that he was distraught with the loss of his brother.

I heard a cry of anger followed by the sound of something heavy hitting the ground. I rushed towards Zeus' temple and there he was, standing in front of his father's statue. A bronze brazier was lying by his feet, the coals spilling onto the floor.

"Jason," I called. He didn't glance up but I was sure he heard me.

"I let him die, Rhea. How can I possibly be alright knowing that I let my brother die?" He kicked some of the coals.

I took a step towards him and gripped his right arm.

"Don't blame yourself. I know you did all you could. It's a battlefield. There are many things that could go wrong and you can't prepare for all of them. I should know. My mother is a goddess of war."

Jason chuckled bitterly. "Father was outraged."

I glanced up warily.

"How did you know?" I asked.

He shrugged. "I felt it. His anger surged through my veins, giving me strength to clear a path to my brother's body."

I nodded and looked down. That's when I noticed the bloody gash across his chest.

"You're hurt! We need to take you to a healer!" I tugged his hand but he pulled me back.

Jason shook his head. "I'm fine. It's nothing ambrosia can't fix."

I glared at him and he laughed.

"Don't worry about me."

"How can I not? You always seem to find trouble, rather, trouble always seems to find you."

He smiled fondly at me before leaning forward and capturing my lips with his.

~SPQR~

"After many years, the war is over! And we, Trojans, have emerged victorious!" King Priam announced. "We shall not forget the brothers and sons we lost in the battle..."

Priam trailed off. The entire hall fell silent. Paris stood up, holding Helen's hand.

"But we should relish in this victory! Cheer louder so our cries of success will reach the afterlife and tell the ones we lost that their sacrifice was not wasted! Let them know that we have pushed back the Achaeans back to their homes!"

The hall erupted in shouts of joy. I glanced to my right and Jason was clapping with everyone else. I smiled but I couldn't help but feel that there was something horribly wrong. Jason noticed me staring at him. He pulled me to one side.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

I frowned. "It just doesn't make sense," I replied. "Why would the Achaeans just leave like that? And where did that horse come from?"

Jason thought for a moment. "Do you think the horse is some kind of trap?"

I nodded. "Most definitely."

Jason paused.

"They could've used the wood from their ships-"

"-which is why none were in sight-"

"-and the horse could be hollow-"

"-and it's big enough to fit their whole army."

Jason's eyes widened in horror.

"It's not a surrender. It's an ambush," he realized.

"Jason, you have to tell King Priam. His people are in danger," I told him.

He nodded and told me to stay put.

I watched as he pushed through the crowd in an effort to reach the king. He was stopped by none other than Paris. I couldn't hear the words being exchanged but I was sure that Jason told the prince our speculation.

Paris laughed and waved his hand, much to my chagrin and Jason's irritation.

My husband almost literally stormed back towards me. A few people jumped back as if they were electrocuted when he passed by them.

"Paris won't listen and he won't let me talk to his father," he said. He pulled out a sheathed dagger and handed it to me.

"Queen Hecuba will be asking you and the other attendants to go with her after tonight's festivities," he said.

"That's probably when the assault will start," I mumbled. "I'm going to need a bigger weapon."

Jason chuckled and took back the dagger. He removed the sheathed sword around his waist.

"I can get a spare sword from the armory. Are you sure you can use this?" he teased.

I rolled my eyes at him. "Jason you forget, I'm the daughter of a war goddess. I can use any weapon."

"When it starts, bring the Queen to the ships," he said.

"I'll wait for you by the docks," I told him.

Jason shook his head. "As soon as the enemy comes in sight, leave."

"I'm not leaving you here!" I insisted.

He held my face and drew me closer, kissing me as if it were our last time together. I held his wrists. He pulled back and brought our foreheads together.

"I'll follow if I can." He tried to give me a reassuring smile but somehow, I knew that everything would go wrong.

"I love you," I whispered.

"As do I, you," he answered.

~SPQR~

As we predicted, Achaean soldiers poured out of the horse. It was a massacre. I was able to lead the queen and the other attendants safely to the ships together with some Trojan soldiers. My chiton was covered in the blood of the Achaean soldiers who tried to stop us.
I stood on the deck of the ship, my eyes searched for any sign of my husband's mop of golden curls.

There! my heart practically screamed. Then suddenly, I felt as if I was drenched in cold water.

He was limping, his left leg was bloody. Blood dripped down the side of his face.

"Jason!" I yelled. I tried to get off the ship but hands wrapped around my waist, keeping me onboard.

"Aeneas!" Jason shouted.

The person holding me seemed to acknowledge the name.

"Lead everyone to safety!" my husband yelled. "And take care of my wife! Promise me!"

"I will!" Aeneas shouted back.

"Jason, what are you talking about?" I tried to elbow Aeneas' face. "We're getting out of here, together!"

I locked eyes with my husband one last time as the ship began to pull away.

'I love you,' he mouthed. My heart sank.

He turned around and raised his sword, charging towards the enemy.

I watched as an arrow embedded itself into his chest, followed by another. And another. And another...

I lost count.

Soon, the land that was once my home disappeared from sight. I cried out in anguish. Aeneas finally let go of me.

My knees buckled and I hit the deck.

~SPQR~

That was the first. Our first life. The first time we found each other. The first time I loved him. The first time I lost him.

Notes

*sniffs* No, I'm not crying. *le wipes* Okay! So I had to let that out of my chest. I based this on Homer's Iliad. Sarpedon is an actual character, he is not an OC. The term "Achaeans" also came from the Iliad. It's another way to say "Greeks" (actually it's more specific but, eh.)

I know what you're going to say "Reyna's not bad-ass enough!" I have an explanation for that. Don't hit me.

Take note that this is set in Ancient Greece (Troy which is in Greece, ish. Ugh wait. The Greeks wanted to invade Troy. There!) Women weren't given as much importance as men. Jason and Reyna (in this period, Rhea) are a bit different from the rest hence the 'finishing each other's sentences' and 'imma give you a weapon because you can use one' bits.

I'm too lazy to clarify the Enyo-Bellona part so if you want to know, my Author's Notes/PJO blog is fenrir-glacies. tumblr. com (just remove the spaces). Hit up my ask or smth. Ye.

I'll be updating at least once a month or two. I have stupid school and I'm working on a larger, long-term story. It's a series and it'll probably take me five years to finish everything. Of course, I'm still going to update this story. I have the outline of the next chapters ready and writing them will be a breeze (because HISTORY, that's why). Anyway, until the next updates!

Fenrir out~