A Very Cold Reunion

Hailey would never look at toddlers the same way again. It had been a rough day, if “rough” is the word you use to describe a day in which you get attacked by what look like the Green Giant’s chubby, fanged children. She had just been minding her own business at school, sitting among the dandelions in the soccer field and attempting to chew a very dry whole-wheat PB & J, when all of a sudden a small, very angry-looking toddler seemed to appear out of nowhere.

“Nasty wheat,” he growled. glaring at her lunch and looking very much like he wanted to crush it in his pudgy hands.

“Um,” replied Hailey, holding the tasteless sandwich out of his reach.

“Oats are much better,” he announced, nodding approvingly at her granola bar. “Too bad you can’t eat that. You’ll die first.”

“Excuse me?” Hailey gaped. “Uh, how did you even get in here?” she asked slowly, scooting away from the creepy toddler. The child tilted his head. His eyes were an unnatural shade of green, and far more cunning than the average five-year-old’s. As she looked closer, even his skin seemed to have a pale green tinge, but it had to be a trick of the light. But then the chubby little boy smiled, and Hailey dropped her sandwich and scrambled backwards. The few teeth he had were pointed fangs.

“Hey, flower girl! Can I have your granola b...aaagh!” Hailey breathed a silent sigh of relief as the demon toddler’s head snapped around to check out the new arrival. Hailey’s sort-of-friend Dusty was always asking her for food, even though he always had some left over at the corners of his mouth (ew). But Hailey didn’t mind him much, because he liked flowers and nature almost as much as she did. He was even strangely attracted to trees; one day she found him flirting with a tall maple, and when he saw her, he blushed beet red and muttered something about not being a treehugger, although he wished the tree would LET him. Now Hailey just hoped Dusty’s weirdness would include both wanting to make out with trees and not being terrified of green children with fangs.

“Another karpos?” Dusty groaned. “This school is like, infested. Someone get me a weedwhacker.”

The karpos made a sound very much like a snarl. “Dirty goat boy. Weedwhackers are for weeds, not oats!”

Hailey stifled a scream as two light, silky wings sprouted from the toddler’s back. He sprang towards Dusty, fangs bared. Hailey grabbed helplessly for something, ANYTHING, to throw at him. Her fingers closed around the granola bar, and she flung it at the karpos, hoping it would at least distract him. The snack sailed through the air, heading in a direct arc towards the demon toddler...when suddenly his body dissolved into...grains? The whirling maelstrom of apple-flavored oatmeal absorbed the granola bar, and in the same instant the karpos re-formed, heading straight for Dusty.

“DUSTY-!” Hailey screeched, but her cry was cut off as her mouth dropped open. Dusty flung off his beat-up Converse and roundhouse-kicked the karpos so hard that the force almost knocked the toddler’s diaper off. The karpos let out a wail and dissolved into oatmeal, which scattered in the wind. His empty diaper floated to the ground, but when Hailey looked again, she suddenly realized it was a brown loincloth. She blinked and rubbed her eyes, sure that this was just a terrible dream. Dusty looked at her and grinned, breathing heavily and straightening his bent glasses. Then he turned and winked spasmodically at a nearby oak tree.

“Been practicing that one for a long time,” he announced, making a great show of dusting the oatmeal fragments off his hooves.

Wait, HOOVES!?? Hailey tried to scream, but it came out as a very confused squeak. Dusty’s triumphant grin quickly faded.

“Oh, right,” he mumbled. “Sorry. I, uh...um...come with me!” he blurted. He trotted over, grabbed her hand, and pulled her to her feet. “There’s someone I know that you should probably talk to.”

Hailey hoped it was a psychologist...she had just been attacked by a vampire baby made of oatmeal, and Dusty had hooves. There was no way her day could get any crazier.

Notes

Meet the first of my new characters, Hailey Lawrence! This chapter was a bit of a rush job, because I procrastinate like crazy, so half of it was written ten minutes ago. Nonetheless, I hope you enjoy! Technically, this is chapter one, since the last was a prologue. As stated before, any constructive criticism, feedback, or ideas are completely welcome.