Reviews and Recommendations

Okay, BEFORE I START....When I review, I give you a certain number of points out of ten on subjects that I think are critical to the story. After I complete giving you points, I take them and average them out, and that's the rating that I give your story. If you fix what I point out, and I find it to be satisfactory to MY taste, I'll come back and edit the review and boot your points up so you have a better rating. Needless to say, I don't hold back from my opinions, so if I offend you, I apologize in advance. Just realize I am entitled to my own opinion, and if you aren't satisfied with what I have to say, I'm sorry.

Okay, SO. DaughterOfTheSky asked me to review her two stories, which I read a few hours ago. Here you go:

Storm Princess

I found your ideas to be interesting, but I was distracted by the fact that there were no paragraphs or separation of your thoughts. However, I do think that your thoughts could be better organized, because it's confusing as to what is going on, BUT, like so many others, you have an awesome idea and when it is improved, you're going to do great! I liked the title of your story, which is why I'm reviewing it first.

Cover picture, Characters, and Summary - 9
I LOVED YOUR COVER PICTURE!!! OMG I love the ocean SO MUCH! Great pick! You were great on characters, plus your summary was different, but not really a summary. As I said before, I would suggest being a bit clearer on what your story is about so you can draw readers in. Your front page appearance is HUGE.

Plot - 5
I thought your plot was interesting, but I would love to see some changes that would leave the reader shocked. It really is a WHOA factor.

Chapter Length/Content - 3
I found the length of your chapters to be short. The content was confusing, and there were no breaks in your text or ideas.

Recent update - I'll bump up to 6

Basic Editing Skills - 3
There were a few errors made in your text that should be edited out - A suggestion would be to use spell-check before publishing to catch the typos that you make when typing. I say that a lot, and all the time, but you should. It strengthens your text body, plus it makes everything seem smoother.

Recent update - I'll bump up to 4

Overall Grammatical Structure - 1
You were missing everything. Capitalization, punctuation, paragraphs, and dialogue spaces...it was really choppy and hard to read. There was a huge problem with capitalization. It was everywhere and in all the wrong spots.Try reading through my Grammatical Structures chapter for some tips. You were missing quotation marks, spacing, basic punctuation, and misspelling of words...It was bad. I'm sorry, but it needs to be fixed. I will check in later and see if you did...then I'll boost your points.

Recent Update - I'll bump up to 6

Descriptive Elements - 2
There weren't very many adjectives used in your work, so I didn't get a great picture of what you're talking about. HOWEVER, I do think that you can improve on this because you don't use the smae few adjectives every other sentence. So, this should be an easy up.

My Comprehension - 4
I had a difficult time understanding what you were talking about, because of the bad errors made in your text, but I have a general idea of what your wrote about. So, never give up! Keep going!

I'll bump these up to 9

Okay, so the rating for this story is...4.0. If these problems don't irk you, I think you'll find yourself a good read on your hands!

Recent update gives a 6.7.

NEXT!!!!

The Forbidden Daughter

Okay, before I even start...DUDE. The "I am..." part...OMG. That's awesome!!! :D Okay. Anyway. I found that your story, though different with the plot ideas, was grammatically the same as the previous, which means I struggled to read it. BUT I really liked the plot line better for this one. I thought it to be more interesting, but that's just my opinion.

Cover picture, Characters, and Summary - 8
Your cover picture for this one was a bit of a let down for me because I loved your other one so much, but it's still neat. Your character list is complete, which is good, but all I'd have to say is your summary could be expanded upon.

Plot - 10
I hated your plot. Oh wait...I LOVED IT!!! I found it to be much cooler to read about than your other story, plus I like Nichole. She was amusing. :)

Chapter Length/Content - 4
Your chapters might have been longer than the others, but it wasn't enough to get necessary information in. Plus...The content was confusing. BUT they had a value to me, so I did get some enjoyment out of reading.

(Your editing and grammar are exactly the same for me, so I just copied and pasted.)

Basic Editing Skills - 3
There were a few errors made in your text that should be edited out - A suggestion would be to use spell-check before publishing to catch the typos that you make when typing. I say that a lot, and all the time, but you should. It strengthens your text body, plus it makes everything seem smoother.

Overall Grammatical Structure - 1
You were missing everything. Capitalization, punctuation, paragraphs, and dialogue spaces...it was really choppy and hard to read. There was a huge problem with capitalization. It was everywhere and in all the wrong spots.Try reading through my Grammatical Structures chapter for some tips. You were missing quotation marks, spacing, basic punctuation, and misspelling of words...It was bad. I'm sorry, but it needs to be fixed. I will check in later and see if you did...then I'll boost your points.

Descriptive Elements - 3
You did better with descriptions, though I think you could use more verbs and adjectives than you are now. Paint that picture in your readers mind, girl! I know you can do it. ;)

My Comprehension - 5
It was about the same as your previous story, but I liked this one better. (ehehehe) So I gave you a bonus point. ;)

Okay, so the rating for this story is...5.5. (the extra points were because of my enjoyment) If these problems don't irk you, I think you'll find yourself a good read on your hands! :)

Notes