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Homepage › Stories › On the streets › Chapter 5

On the streets

Authors note

So the warrior woman was Allie's mom, Athena so I'm just going to write a short story of what Allie was feeling at the moment

The old woman got us up. Her voice so persuading. I was so startled by the man waking up and turning into the giant, but when that woman transformed, we locked eyes for a moment. Something about her eyes was so familiar, I know Ive seen them before. But where. for a moment, I had no idea what was happening; but those eyes. I know Ive seen them.

Notes

Comments

@ivenomeansbywhichtodefend
Thank you for the critique and your right, after not seeing this for a while I realize that this is true. (Sorry I took so long to reply)

Demigod of Olympus Demigod of Olympus
11/9/16

I really really like your story and the way it's going, but I am going to critique a little. You need to slow down a bit. You've got all these ideas jumbled into your head, and you're writing them so fast that a lot of the detail which makes it flow isn't getting in. But I really like the direction this is heading! I'm really excited to read more like bouncing in my seat kind of excited

ivenomeansbywhichtodefend ivenomeansbywhichtodefend
10/2/16

Nice

Constrictor Constrictor
1/23/16

I love it please update

Kat1st Kat1st
11/28/15

This is good as!

Go_chase_a_Donut Go_chase_a_Donut
11/26/15
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